Canada Morning Brief: Everything you need to know for July 11

Hello “Andrew from Narcity here!” ☕

Since our last edition of Morning Brief from CanadaHank Scorpio-wannabe Elon Musk pulled out of his massive bid to buy Twitter, leading everyone to do the exact same thing a bit vulgar and extremely obvious joke about the father of (at least) nine children.

Psst… You can now sign up for the (much superior) email version of this newsletter here.

In case you missed it

1. If you’re reading this, I guess Rogers decided to work today

One of the interesting things about the Canadian telecommunications oligopoly is that a company like Rogers can have a day off and bring down large swaths of the country’s infrastructure. Either way, service is back after all the chaos on Friday — which means those affected should check out Lisa Belmonte’s breakdown of what you need to know to get credit for your service interruption.

  • But what happened? “We now believe we have narrowed the cause to a network system failure following a maintenance update to our core network, which caused some of our routers to malfunction early Friday morning,” the Rogers CEO wrote. , Tony Staffieri, in a press release.
  • A laughing matter: If you’re in the mood for a laugh, Brooke Houghton curated some of the best Rogers meltdown memes.

2. I don’t even know how to title this section on what Howie Mandel posted

It’s not click bait; this is me trying to save you from having to gaze at the TikTok that Canadian comedian, talent show judge and famous germaphobe Howie Mandel posted – then thankfully deleted – on Saturday. The gist, as best as Sarah Rohoman can explain, is this: Mandel posted a video of “(his) friend Neil” suffering from a prolapsed rectum and the comedian suggested it might have something to do with it. do with COVID-19. If you’re a real freak and want to know more, click here I guess.

  • My opinion : Maybe Rogers could have waited another day before reactivating my wireless coverage.

3. Feds Say Passport Renewal Waits Will Soon “Drop Significantly”

Relief should come to those nonsensical lines at the passport renewal office thanks to a host of new measures designed to deal with Canada’s backlog, reports Lisa Belmonte. An expanded triage system that will prioritize people with urgent travel needs and the addition of new specialist staff trained to approve passports are among the new initiatives. Here’s what else you need to know if you need to renew your passport in the near future.

4. Doja Cat is crazy about “Stranger Things” at will because of leaked DMs

stranger things Star Noah Schnapp is in hot water with Doja Cat after he exposed his behind-the-scenes attempts to hook up with one of his co-stars from the hit Netflix series. In a direct message, the rapper asked Schnapp, 17, to “tell Joseph (Quinn) to hit (her)” – which Schnapp then posted to his more than 30 million TikTok followers with the caption: ” LMAOO slides in his dms.” For more on what Ms. Cat had to say about Mr. Schnapp’s indiscretion, here’s Cata Balzano.

  • This viral tweet pretty much sums up what this story looks like from my perspective.

5. This new jungle-themed lazy river near Montreal has spooky laser beams

There’s a lot going on at this new water park near Montreal, which claims to be the world’s first lazy river with a multi-sensory tunnel. Was there before a lazy river with a Single-sensory tunnel? It’s something you can gaze at while drifting through 75 feet of jungle-themed animations and lasers. Megan Renaud has the scoop on Super Aqua Club’s new Zephyr River.

What else you need to know today

🎉 HOLIDAYS
We usually feature a lot of entirely insignificant “holidays” in this space, but today’s one is actually significant: It’s the 11th day of the seventh month, so come down to 7-Eleven and celebrate National Slurpee Day with a cup of high fructose corn syrup flavored ice cream. Here are the details.

🎤 MENDES TAKES A BREAK
After consulting with medical professionals, Pickering-born pop superstar Shawn Mendes announced on Saturday that he was postponing three weeks of gigs after reaching “a breaking point” with his mental health. Get well, Shawn!

🐴 CALGARY STAMPEDE
If you build it, Kevin Costner will come. While some Hollywood cowboys are “all hats, no cattle,” the Yellowstone was impressed with his equestrian skills while serving as parade provost marshal for this year’s Calgary Stampede. The event continues this Sunday.

🏠 SURREAL DOMAIN
If you’ve got around $1.4 million lying around, you could probably do worse than this amazing house for sale in Nova Scotia, which has its own private white sand beach and stunning ocean views.

🎂 ANNIVERSARIES
Canadian pop star Alessia Cara turns 26 today. At 48, rapper Lil’ Kim is a bit more grown-up than her stage name suggests. Robert the Bruce, King of Scots, would have been 748 years old today; alas, it was shot down at its height in the 14th century.

Thanks for reading Narcity’s Canada Morning Brief – the only newsletter that has something nice to say about Robert the Bruce’s haircut.

Let me know what you liked (and disliked) about today’s edition at [email protected]

Have a nice day and see you tomorrow !

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